A Month of Friendship // with Audrey Caylin

Monday, September 10, 2018

This week I have Miss Audrey popping in here and sharing about friendship. If you'd like to check out her blog she blogs at audreycaylin.com

Until several years ago, I considered myself friendless.

My contacts for email were limited to family and relatives. While I saw people out and about every day, and some consistently when I went to dance class, there was no one I could consider a “friend.” I felt out of place: what sort of teenager doesn’t have any friends? I thought. Yet in hindsight, I can finally see what God wanted me to learn about true friendships… before I even had any friends.

Out of the dozens of people I met over the years, the opportunity for a meaningful connection seemed perfect. “Oh, look, they live so close to us!” “Hey, she’s into biking too!” “Wow, our birthdays are only a week apart!” are some of the thoughts that ran through my head upon meeting these potential friends.

But then… it didn’t work. Not that we weren’t on friendly terms, but that ‘spark’ of true friendship wasn’t there.

It was frustrating. The spark never seemed to be there for me. I’d just about given up and resigned to the fact that I would be without real friends for the rest of my life when those ‘friendship sparks’ started showing up in the most unexpected places, and I suddenly had friends.

This isn’t to say that you can’t be friends with anyone. You can. But oftentimes the best friendships just “pop up” out of nowhere and become very strong very fast. And I’ve learned that there is no way to make them happen: they just happen as and when God wills them to. We have to learn to be patient. Consistently hanging out with people who don’t inspire us, give us energy, or encourage us in Christ isn’t doing any one—least ourselves—any good. And while I didn’t believe it all the times my mom told me….

The wait for good friends is so, so worth it.
One of the most frequently occurring thoughts I had over those years was: “so I don’t have friends—I don’t need them anyway. I have family. I have God.”

While that thought process wasn’t entirely false (family and God are pretty amazing), it wasn’t entirely true either. It wasn’t until I had good friendships that I realized just how much happier, stronger, and more Christ-focused I was. I needed that encouragement and connection from people beyond my family, especially ones that I shared similar interests with.

We were not made to be alone (Genesis 2:18). And while we should never be afraid of being without friends, as God often leads us alone to the desert to find Him, the second greatest commandment is “love your neighbor as yourself” for a reason. God created us to be in fellowship with other human beings. They encourage us, pray for us, edify us, inspire us, laugh with us, and make us better people. They teach us about ourselves and about God. They help us to become who God created us to be. As Proverbs 27:17 tells us: “Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another.”
When I began to build good friendships, I pictured them like shinny gems dropped into my hand, entrusted to me by God. Being without them for so many years, my friends were nearly as valuable as the relationships I had with my family.

Some people treasure their friends. Some people do not. Either way, friends are treasures. These are other human beings with a soul loved by God Himself who are taking time from their lives to talk with you, pray for you, and hang out with you. That’s special.

Maybe it sounds weird and melodramatic to say all that. But if you really, truly think about it, good friends are that precious. They’re people Christ died for. They’re busy human beings who want to get to know you better and pray for your well-being. They’re your brothers and sisters in Christ. We all make mistakes and get stressed, but those friends never deserved to be walked all over, dumped, or hated. They deserve to be cherished, valued, and loved, and in return you hope that they will do the same to you.

Several months ago, I got to meet many of my good friends in person at last. It was a surreal moment. While I’d been talking with many of them online for quite a while, finally being able to look them in the eye and hug them was amazing. During the time I spent with them, all these three points flew through my head, but a fourth one came more strongly, one that sums up everything I’ve wanted to say in this post:
Audrey Caylin is full-time dreamer and aspiring indie author who loves wild journeys, colorful phoenixes, and tea and pizza (though not together). Somewhere along the way, she began searching for green flashes at sunset and embraced a mission to weave tales that tell of Hope and point toward Truth. Being a ghostwriter for God is now her greatest honor and joy next to helping other writers improve their own stories. She's a proud member of the Young Writers Workshop, guildmaster of a band of epic Ereki at Story Embers, and often suffers from wanderlust. She finds a cure for that and inspiration for her stories by driving along the west coast with the windows rolled down or by tilting her face to the sky on rainy days. She blogs at audreycaylin.com

Thanks so much Audrey for sharing! If you enjoyed this post be sure to check out Audrey's blog and leave a comment to let us know :) 

Until next week friends!

Photo by Helena Lopes on Unsplash

1 comment:

  1. Thanks so much for contributing Audrey! I so enjoyed reading your post :)


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